OVERCOMPENSATING
May 19, 2006 | PERMALINK | SHARE
  The Illiterate Princess, Part 4

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The Illiterate Princess, Part 4

Friday, May 19, 2006 - 12:59 AM

The Illiterate Princess story begins !Part four! Arthur C. Clarke once said "Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic." Is the same true for sufficiently obsolete technologies? Our current methods of storying important data aren't very sturdy if you think about it. A couple of good-sized solar flares can turn all this Cyberdata into useless wads of silicon-infused fiberglass. The only reason we know many things about ancient history is because they were literally written in stone. Are future civilzations going to know what to do with an USB flash drive? Are there going to any future civilizations? That's why I use lasers to write all my important information (imbedded in the code of Metallica mp3s) on diamonds, and put the diamonds in a steel-reinforced, titanium case with an electromagnetic seal. Each day I hide the Case deep within a mountain in the Middle East, and I employ a small cadre of Knights to stand guard in the Master Chamber. The Knights realize it is their solemn duty to guard the Case, and require only sandwiches for their work. They have also agreed to pass on the responsibility to their descendants for as many generations as possible. In the event of the Knights' extinction, with his final breath, the last remaining Knight is instructed to activate a failsafe device which consists a series of tests and booby-traps that will ensure the only living creature that can gain access to my recipes, receipts, and sketches will be a being of absolute, benevolent purity. You just can't be too sure these days.



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