I was honestly surprised as crap when I found out they killed Osama bin Laden. I'm one of those people who was completely convinced he died years ago, and that they would never even find his skeleton. This was a weird thing to hear. The first thing that popped into my mind was "yeah right, good timing." Then I found out they dumped his body in the ocean, like 800 miles from where they caught him.I started thinking weird thoughts, doubting. I started reading the conspiracy websites and learned that Bin Laden's body had been frozen in D.C. since 2002, waiting for the right time to be thawed out. Is this the right time? Wouldn't this justify a small defense budget cut and help strengthen foreign relations during a rocky time? Wouldn't this help the Obama Administration's credibility from stalling out?
Then I realized that I was starting to believe in the conspiracy theories more than the actual story even though the conspiracy theories had absolutely no evidence, as opposed to the somewhat questionable but completely believable actual story.
Then I realized I was thinking like the birthers and the truthers. Then I saw video of Americans guzzling beer in the streets of New York City, ecstatically celebrating the violent death of a (horrible) human being. Then I decided to finally get around to playing Portal. Oh. Now I get 80% of the jokes from the past three years.
How come every time I spend billions of dollars and almost a decade to kill a guy in a suburban mansion, fly his body 800 miles, and dump him in the ocean I’m a bad guy?
The whole thing is especially suspect considering I caught the dude like five years ago.
